


over the fence

by theknightofdoom



Series: DAVEKAT WEEK 2015 [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst and Humor, Davekat Week, Humanstuck, Humor, M/M, Pining, SO, a lil, angsty, but it isnt IN highschool, davekat - Freeform, davekat week day 1, dumb basically, i guess, theyd be seniors when they go back btw idk if i actually said that, theyre in highscool
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-30
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-04-18 04:50:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4692650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theknightofdoom/pseuds/theknightofdoom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>karkat vantas makes an unexpected friend on the other side of his fence after his first near-death experience (not really). </p><p>it's basically karkat and dave being kinda silly and karkat pining a little.</p>
            </blockquote>





	over the fence

**Author's Note:**

> this is meant to be in all lower caps btw so dont freak out
> 
> idk why i just wanted to do it
> 
> also this is for the first day of davekat week (woo, go davekat, yeah), which is a humanstuck au.
> 
> also, i think i'll write more to this, because it doesn't really feel finished, but i couldnt really write anymore and its almost tomorrow which is day 2 soooooooooooo
> 
> (if it never gets more tough luck bc i have a million unfinished fics online and offline *intense shrug*)
> 
> ALSO THERE ARE LOTS OF TYPOS AND I CANT FIX THEM ATM SO IM SORRY PLEASE TRY TO UNDERSTAND???

it was summer and you knew nobody.

this was, of course, your father's brilliant idea. to move you and kankri to the new house in the summer before school starts, with the reasoning that it'll give you the chance to get settled into the new house better because you won't be stressed out from school.

you think it's a load of bullshit.

but there was nothing you could do, and even if there was, it was too late now, because you were stood in your new room in a new house in a new town at the beginning of the summer holidays and you had _no friends_.

so of course you did what any sane person would do and locked yourself up in your room with the air con cranked almost as high as your angsty teen rock music while playing video games and watching your favorite movies on repeat. the less you moved in a day, the more achieved you felt.

it was almost a fortnight later until you finally decided to go outside, and that was mainly because your brother wouldn't stop nagging you about sitting inside all day like a lazy asshole (obviously not in those words. many, many, many more words.). you fixed the problem by sitting outside all day like a lazy asshole.

reading outside turned out to be a thing you surprisingly enjoyed, and a little sun on your skin could hardly hurt you, right?

you were 2 chapters into your current tropey romance novel when you remembered you have hay fever, and the neighbors to your left seemed to be having a jolly fucking time mowing their lawn.

you were determined not to sneeze. you were better than this, you were more than hay fever. you managed to keep yourself from sneezing all the way until they finished, your eyes watering and making it nigh impossible to actually read your book, but you kept soldiering on, because you were _unstoppable_.

you sneeze, really loudly.

"bless you." comes a voice from the left side of the fence.

you scream, really loudly.

"holy shit." they say.

you gasp a breath, trying to compose yourself, face burning red with embarrassment. you can't believe you just fucking _screamed_ like that, much less at some stranger saying bless you from the other-

wait. were they _laughing_?!

"hey, this isn't goddamn funny you fucknugget, i could have had an actual heart attack! what if i was some sweet old lady and you _killed_ _me_ , huh?"

the person on the other side of the fence started laughing even harder, which only served to make you more mad.

"stop laughing!"

"i'm sorry, man, it's just too funny. i'm the sneezing murderer, can't be caught, it's those fucking bless you's and then my victim's out like a light for good. everyone lives in fear of the almighty sneezing murderer, scared to sneeze, first the sweet old lady next door, who know's who's next." "

oh my god," you sigh, realizing you were just kind of stood awkwardly next to the fence, since the scare had made you jump up out of the lounger. an awkward silence stretches out, and you keep standing there for some reason and just as you're about to sit down the voice comes back again. you only jump a little, but despite your paranoid glance of embarrassment at the wooden panel separating you, they couldn't have known this time since you didn't make any noise.

their voice is kinda deep, and you're certain there's an accent they're trying to conceal. "so, you're the new neighbor?"

"yeah, my dad, my brother and i just moved here from tennessee."

"kinda weird timing, huh?"

"tell me about it," you grumble, flopping back down on your lounge chair. "i get to do fuck all for the entirety of the summer since i literally know no one."

"that sucks," they offer in what you guess is a sympathetic tone, and it sounds like they're just about to add something else when another voice chimes in from further away.

"brother dearest, john and jade have arrived. it would be rude to leave our friends waiting, correct?"

"oh, right, yeah. i forgot harley and egbert were coming round." he shoots back, there's a moment of silence before he speaks again. "sorry, duty calls, etcetera. you know how it is."

"obviously." you reply smoothly, hiding your disappointment. it was kind of nice to have someone new to talk to.

"i'll, uh, hear you around or something."

"try not to murder anyone else with your 'bless you's."

and then you think he walks away. it's hard to tell, because you can't see him. you can't help but hope that you get to talk to your neighbor again. the realization comes all to late that you never got his name.

you sneeze again, but this time the only one there to hear it is you and your discarded romance novel.

you think your done with the back lawn today.

* * *

 

it's two days later when you next encounter your neighbor. you were applying sun screen, although unhappily, because your brother wouldn't get off your back about it. you were pretty sure it wasn't a problem, at all really, especially considering you had darker skin to begin with and rarely got burnt in the time you did spend in the sun. but kankri had a stick up his butt, and this time the stick was about skin cancer, so you were slathering the nasty bluish cream over your arms. you didn't even realize you were humming until the strangers voice rang out, scaring the shit out of you, yet again.

"nice tune you got there."

you only yelped. a little.

"have you been waiting out in your back lawn just so you can ambush me like that?" you ask cattily, trying to squeeze more cream out of the almost empty bottle.

"of course, ever since our first meeting i couldn't keep you out of my head, baby, you're the only one for me. i had to see you again." he responds with hesitation, and a massive glob of sun screen finally shoots out of the bottle, making a weird wheezing noise.

"that happens a lot, the sound of my voice is so enchanting."

"it's like you put me under a spell. are you a witch? is that why you moved? you got kicked out of your last town because you're a witch who seduces the most gorgeous guys around, didn't you?"

slathering the last part of the sticky paste on your legs, you snort softly. "it's quite bold of you to say that you're one of the most gorgeous guys around, you know that, right?"

"hey, i'm not one of the most gorgeous guys around. i am the hottest piece of tail in this entire state, i'll have you know, and putting me under your evil witch spell is gonna be harder than you think. how would all of my many admirers even cope?"

"they would just have to make do letting you go, say farewell to the object of their affects, the godliness that is..." you remember you still don't know this guys name, so you ask as you toss the now empty and slightly mauled bottle to the ground and lay back, stretching out a little. the sun is nice, which is something you didn't think you'd normally say.

"strider. dave strider." he answers, the question hovering silently in the air.

"karkat vantas."

"it's my pleasure to hear your melodic vocal chords, sir vantas." dave says very seriously.

"it's all mine," you say just as seriously, closing your eyes.

* * *

you've been talking to dave for about two weeks now.

"wait, every day?" sollux asks incredulously, his voice tinny through the phone.

"yes, everyday. what's so hard to believe about that?" you snap back, trying to snipe some dude in the back of the head from your hidden camping spot. it doesn't work.

"kk, you didn't thpeak to me everyday. much leth in perthon." he lisps, voice dripping with his usual sarcastic and biting demeanor.

"that's because you're an asshole. fuck you." the screen changes to the one that shows once you had been killed, and you curse under your breath. "fuck this game too."

"you thuck at thith game pretty hard," sollux agrees, and you put down your controller in favor of repositioning the phone on your shoulder. "but my point ith, you've been talking to thith guy everday for the patht fortnight and you thtill haven't theen him face to face. it'th kinda weird."

"how is it kinda weird?! we just talk because we're both outside everday by coincidence. why do we need to see each other face to face?"

"i mean, it'th pretty fucking obviouth you have a cruth on him, kk."

"i do not have a crush on dave, you moronic good-for-nothing shit eater. just because i talk to him a lot doesn't mean i like him that way!"

"uh huh."

"shut up!" you growl in annoyance, flopping down face-first into your bed. there's silence from both sides of the line, other that the echo-y noise of sollux's still running session of the same game you jut gave up on, until you huff a deep sigh.

"...is it really that obvious?"

he laughs at you.

* * *

you realize you know a lot about dave now, which, okay, is maybe kinda weird considering you have never seen him face-to-face despite living next door. fuck sollux and his stupid reasoning. (because he's right.)

he used to live in texas, which explains the accent you could hear hints of, and if he's laughing enough (or, you found out on one occasion due to his sister rose interrupting, embarrassed enough) he can't hide it anymore.

his voice sounds even more attractive with the accent.

he moved here with his half-sister to live with his two older cousins 5 years ago when some stuff happened with the rest of his family he didn't want to talk about, and his cousin roxy is a really nice girl who acts as a sort of mediator between the other three, as dirk can be a little irritating sometimes. that is, when he's not too busy building robots or something else tech related.

dave admitted he feels bad because they both decided to wait until after rose and dave leave high school to go to college themselves, and he knows how great at his _'building shit'_ dirk is and how smart roxy is, especially with science. he told you all about the high school you'd be attending after the summer holidays end, about the teachers and the lessons and the kids. he tells you about his friends, john and jade and terezi and a load more, and he says that you'll get along with them really well.

in return you tell him about your life in tennassee, about sollux and kanaya and gamzee and the others, about how your mom died when you were a kid, but it's okay because you've had a lot of time grieve and you know she'd want you to keep on living a full life without being sad about hers ending.

you tell him a lot and he tells you a lot.

you don't always talk about that stuff, of course, and you like how your conversations can also be meaningless, full of jokes and jabs and nothing in particular.

you like dave.

* * *

it's nearing the end of the holidays and you still haven't seen dave in person. you are kind of worried.

"and why are you worried?"

"i think it's pretty obvious why i'm worried, kanaya." you sigh, and she sighs back, brushing her short hair back into place, even though it never left it. you had kept to the promise you made each other about regular skype calls.

"maybe it would be good for you to elaborate, more for the sake of discussing the issue and resolving it." she offers, smiling a little to prompt you.

"it's just- we've been talking a lot, and, you know, i like him a lot too."

"yes?"

"and i'm worried he doesn't like me back."

"and?"

"and that the fact that i'm an unattractive sack of shit won't help!"

kanaya sighs even deeper than before, rubbing the bridge of her nose. "karkat. you are not an _'unattractive sack of shit'_."

"kan-"

"karkat." she says sternly, cutting you off effectively. "i know you have some serious issues with your self-esteem, especially when it comes to your physical appearance, but if you must know, i personally think it's very likely that dave likes you back."

"how would you know?" you counter, but your voice isn't sharp. you can't be a dick to kanaya. you just can't do it.

"maybe i have had correspondence with the lovely miss lalonde, and-"

"what!? i didn't know about this!" you say in surprise.

"yes, i know." kanaya smiles apologetically. "i did intend on telling you."

"how did you even find her?"

"it was more of she found me, in all actuality."

"she... found you?" you repeat, voice showing your confusion.

"you see, it would seem dave had been talking about you to rose, and mentioned me in passing-"

"he was talking about me to rose?"

"please stop interrupting me, karkat, and i can tell you!" you roll your eyes and mutter something about moms under your breath, but let her continue.

"as i was saying," she starts, "dave has been talking about you to rose on occasion, and in so mentioned me. as my name is rather peculiar, she thought it would be relatively easy to track me down, which it was, and we began talking."

"talking about _what_?"

"at first, you and dave's relationship."

you cry out, slipping down into a very uncomfortable position of almost lying down, however the top of your back is still bent so that kanaya can see your face, and therefore distress. _kanaya_ , who knows all about your mushy feelings for dave, talked to _rose_ , who is dave's _evasive sister_. you think your having a heart attack.

"i think i'm having a heart attack."

"karkat, stop being so ridiculous and sit back up."

"no."

"karkat."

"i said no, leave me here to die, this is it. you let this happen kan, you ended my life."

" _karkat_."

"what!" you unhappily answer, only sitting up a little.

"it's not my place to tell you the things that dave has said to rose, but i just thought you should know, that even if he _doesn't_ like you romantically, he isn't going to care what you look like!"

you don't reply, crossing your arms with a shrug.

"and anyway, i assure you, i'm not just saying this because i am your friend; you are a very attractive young man."

there's silence for a little bit, and you smile softly, because you can't not smile at kanaya. "thanks, kanaya."

"it is no problem."

* * *

you were going to do it.

you were going to ask dave if he wanted to meet you face to face.

you had it all planned; you were going to casually wait for the right moment, and then, you would ask if he wanted his ass beaten at one of your video games. it was subtle, it was perfect. you were scripting how it was going to go in your head as you take out the trash.

and then you see him.

why did you take the trash out it a baggy old hole-riddled t-shirt and stained sweatpants, again?

as you shove the trash in the trashcan outside, you turn your head and he's there. you know it's him. of course it would be him.

he's tall. you aren't short, you never were, but compared to him you might as well have been a dwarf. not just tall but _shirtless_ , and fuck, he's got a really attractive torso. he's not insanely ripped but he has definition and you are 100% certain you are about to die.

he hasn't noticed you yet, too busy trying to shove his own overlarge trash bag into the can, but you feel like a deer in the headlights because he's so hot, oh my god, he's really hot and you're wearing _dirty sweatpants_. but then you snap out of it and stop looking at his perfect white hair and his dumb shades that you already knew he wore all the time (because he told you), and you turn back and try to get away as quick as possible without him noticing you.

except, because it has already been stated the world hates you, you trip and go face first into the ground, not being quick enough to muffle your loud " **fuck** " as you go, and you can _feel_ dave's eyes on you. you hate everything. everything sucks.

"hey, you alright?" he asks, and he hasn't even realized it's you yet, oh god, if you reply he'll _know_ , but you can't just get up and leave because he knows you heard him.

you send a quick curse to god and stand up, brushing yourself off irritably.

"i'm just fucking perfect, i like to fall over so that i can make-out with the floor, actually. it's my favorite past time."

you think if he wasn't wearing shades you would have seen his eyes widen, and he takes the hand he hand on the top of the garbage off in surprise. "karkat?" you try to keep your eyes off his chest, or abdomen, or just basically his entire body.

"the one and only." you grumble back and he smiles, like actually fucking _smiles_ and now you're looking at his lips.

"dude, you didn't tell me you were so _short_." dave laughs, still smiling, and you take any excuse to pretend you aren't dressed like a homeless person in front of a really attractive guy you have a crush on _who has freckles oh no_.

"i'm not short, asswipe, you're just obnoxiously tall!"

he laughs amd it's the greatest laugh you've ever experienced.

"you wanna come hang out at my house? since, y'know, we haven't actually done that yet?" he asks casually, hands in the pockets of his jeans and you hate him.

"about time you asked, dickmunch. i was starting to think you were going to get a divorce."

he grins even wider. "wouldn't ever dream of it, where would i be without you?"

**Author's Note:**

> ps ik it sucks but im half asleep i jUST NEED TO CONTRIBUTE TO DAVEKAT WEEK


End file.
